Blind Side . . . and the Holidays.

I know it has been quite some time since I have sat down to write just about anything. So 1st and foremost, my apologies. . .

As I woke up this morning to a gentle and quiet nudge by my husband, I came to a bitter sweet realization that an entire month has flown by in less than a blink. You see for the last month I have been woken up before there is even a hint of daylight, and by anything but a gentle quiet nudge . . . we have had two very little house guests from the Philippines; James (10) and Joshua (9). These young boys were brought to the US through an advocacy program for adoption. We had signed up to host James from November 5th - December 1st. Little did I realize the full extent of what was to come. After one week with just James, we got the call that Joshua was in quite a predicament, and needed to be moved from his current home right away. After a quick prayer and a deep breath, I blurted out . . . why not! Yes, please bring him over tomorrow, it is only three weeks and I am sure we can handle it.

What I did not know was that we were being prepared to be stretched to the brink of breaking . . . After week two (one with Josh) my husband and I looked at each other in utter disbelief that we had made it through the week, and could still eek out a giggle. Each morning my husband called to let me know that he had been praying for me and to make sure all 4 of us and the 2 dogs were all safe and sane. We worked through every emotional issue one baby step at a time, and we did it together. Because if we could not play on the same team there was no way that this crazy set up was going to work at all. Every day we were tested, and pushed to the sidelines, sometime we were ready to jump the boundaries . . . just so we would be given a time out, and there were a couple of times I thought maybe, just maybe, we should throw in the towel. But being the overachiever that I am and my husband being the competitive one he is, quitting was never really an option . . . but mommy and daddy time outs- now that is a treat! we sat down one night and decided to work up a game plan, but game plans are just that, plans, not set in stone scribed and never failing out lines, but a game plan with loop hole and mistakes. Each day seemed to get easier as we worked with the boys, and each day we got a little closer to knowing who these little guests were and what they might become.

My birthday fell on a Sunday this year, and on a day that we were required to give up the entire day to advocate for these boys. It was no big deal to me to postpone my birthday, but my husband know how important birthdays are to me, and he just couldn't make me wait. So on Saturday we took are crew down to see Santa, and to do crafts and browse the big manly outdoor sporting goods store. To my surprise, he had planned a babysitter for all the boys and was going to whisk me off to my favorite eatery, and to a movie (his favorite part). He tried to talk me into some movie I had never heard of, and for some reason I really wanted to see this movie that everone was chattering about (keep in mind we do not have TV, so I was pretty clueless about any movies available at this point). We watched Blind Side, at just the right point in the boys stay. It gave us the umph we needed to make it over the hump and through the last few days of their stay. It made it a little easier to remember that a kink in my day, week or month, is just a kink and that I can work it out, I can take it in stride, and I will still be who I am and hopefully that kink will make me a better wife, sister, friend, mother, daughter and advocator. But these little boys are in their prime, the time in their lives where they are developing into who they WILL be. I can only pray that my family and friends were a light for a month, and that we will continue to be a light for every child we come across.

We take for granted the life that we have been dealt, and we even take for granted the roads we have choosen to take. These sweet boys, were delt some heavy stuff and despite all they have been through, they srtive to be excellent in their own ways. The holidays this year carry a different meaning and a differnt tune. This year, we WILL make it to every family event. This year we will document the important things. This year we will teach our child the true meaning of Christmas. This year Christmas will be about others, not us as individuals, or even our immediate family. This is the 1st year that my husband and I will exchange nothing but stockings (no real gifts) and we will not be exchanging gifts with the nephews and neice (we will do one Unique and Special family gift instead of gifts for all of the kids). We will instead be adopting a family of 5 for the holidays. A family that would have otherwise gone with out gifts, and perhaps without Christmas dinner. I have no idea what there situation is or if we will hold a candle to "The true meaning of Christmas," but it is not about how well we "Do" Christmas, it is how well we TRY to exude the truth. And I will be praying for those that I cannot give a gift this year, I will especially be praying for James and Joshua.